Month: January 2016 (Page 1 of 3)

How many people can relate to being on autopilot?  Running errands, doing chores, driving from point A to point B without paying much attention. I’m often guilty of listening to the radio while I drive and not really listening to the words of the songs played.  Every so often I hear a song that stops me in my tracks with powerful words.  Nicole C. Mullen’s My Redeemer Lives is one of those songs.  Click here to witness for yourself.

A new year brings with it a slew of new resolutions – some related to physical wellness and spiritual wellness to name a few.  We resolve to eat better, exercise more, pray more, etc.  We are bombarded with commercials and emails encouraging us to make changes and although we may not keep the momentum going for long, we start out with good intentions.  At the beginning of the year, in an effort to provide resolution suggestions, the website rcspirituality.org sent an email to its subscribers entitled Year of Resolution. In the email they make reference to G.K. Chesterton, a well known lay theologian, whose reply to the question:  “what’s wrong with the world” was “I am.”  Hmm?  Regardless of how true that is, how  many of us would be willing to admit that? This got me thinking.

We live in a world of blame! We blame the President for a failing government, we blame our parents if our lives don’t turn out as we expect , we blame our significant other for a struggling or failed relationship and so much more.  It may not be true for some, but while playing the blame game most of us  fail to do one thing:  LOOK IN THE MIRROR! When I first began to do some soul searching, one of the things I realized was – the qualities, traits and actions I disliked about others were also within me.  I possessed the very same qualities and traits I despised.  I too acted in the same manner that peeved me.  The more I practiced looking within, the more I realized that I had “issues” too. I was not innocent, but I was convicting others and acquitting myself.  For instance, it would annoy me anytime I had a discussion with someone who needed to have the last word, until I realized – if it bothers me, then I must actually be THAT person, the one who needs to have the last word.  Who made me queen of the last word? This is just one example of many.   We ALL do it, I guess it’s human nature – the person who holds a grudge for the exact thing he’s often guilty of, the people who complain about the negativity that surrounds them but fail to notice the negativity they project, the adult child who complains about mistakes made by his/her parents but fails to recognize the very same mistakes they’re making (I would imagine parenting is not easy).  What is wrong with the world?  WE ARE!

The lesson I learned quite a few years ago has given me the opportunity to change the way I view things.  Now when I realize that I am about to complain, blame or criticize – I take a step back and ask myself:  Why? What is it about this situation that bothers me and how am I to blame for this? I shift the blame to myself, I become the one convicted.  It is only then that I can reveal a truth about myself that I need to change.  It is only then that I can let go, reverse the conviction and forgive.

As I write this reflection, I realize there is a wonderful meditation by Fr. Justin Belitz called Ho’oponopono that speaks to this.  Check it out and download here . You will see the “explanation” and the meditation.  I recommend you download both – the explanation is quite interesting.

So the next time you feel compelled to convict,  I would recommend looking in the mirror.   You may already be looking in the mirror(by looking at OTHERS to blame)  you just can’t see yourself because your vision is clouded by the person you mistakenly perceive yourself to be!  This year of resolution, turn your thoughts inward, change your mind.  Live a happier life with healthier relationships by convicting yourself FIRST.  I promise you, excavating the soul is much more fulfilling than projecting blame!  Good luck and God bless you!